I'm not sure exactly what I'm about to write. This has been a long week for me, emotionally. On Tuesday evening I received the call I have known would come. My grandmother's cancer is spreading again and she is done with treatment. Hospice has been called so now it's just a waiting period.
I've been so blessed with e-mails, phone calls, and Facebook messages from my friends that care about me. I have really appreciated those that have taken the moments to let me know they care.
I hope that throughout this ordeal that follows that I will truly reflect a godly mindset. I know that I have friends that don't believe in God or have walked away from Him. I have friends that would ask why a real God would allow such innocent people to suffer. I could write at length a blog about why there is suffering, but today I won't. None of us are innocent. Even the "best" of people have done wrong things in their lives. My grandmother is looked up to by many people but would be the first to tell you she has done wrong things in her life. However, our sufferings aren't necessarily a judgement of heaven. We live in a fallen world. Believe in God or not, just watch the news or read the local paper and you'll find evidence of that. One of my favorite bumper stickers reads, "Christians aren't perfect, just forgiven." Because I am a Christian doesn't give me superpowers to be above doing wrong. It does hold me to a higher standard though and thankfully I keep short accounts with God recognizing my sin and asking forgiveness for every sin I do is another time I picture the Roman soldier driving the nail into my Savior's hands and feet. Regardless of the suffering I will endure here, I know that glory awaits me where there will be no more suffering or pain. I have security in my future, the same security my grandmother has. My grandfather has been celebrating in heaven for almost 13 years now and I will find a way to rejoice when my grandmother joins him. My faith will not waiver in this world, because if it does, it was not real faith to begin with.
Thank you again to my fellow brothers and sisters in Christ who are doing what the body should do by encouraging me. Thank you to everyone for holding me up. God is good! I hope my life may be a reflection of His love and His saving grace.